


this was an accident (not the kind where sirens sound)

by aeriamamaduck



Series: not gonna get us [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Anxious Katsuki Yuuri, First Dates, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Inexperienced Katsuki Yuuri, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Mercenaries, Oral Sex, Prequel, Rimming, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-26
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2020-10-10 09:24:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20525711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aeriamamaduck/pseuds/aeriamamaduck
Summary: Things like this never happened. Not to Yuuri.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone else ever listen to t.A.T.u.? I still love those songs.

"Will you go out with me?"

Yuuri nearly dropped the glass of seltzer water when he heard that, and several other things occurred in that second right after Victor's words registered in his brain.

Firstly, Yuuri thought it just wasn't possible that Victor had _actually_ asked that, right? Not the devastatingly beautiful mercenary with piercing blue eyes who could have anyone in the world. Not the mentor who'd stolen him away from Tsume. From Minako. 

Second, Yuuri thought he was dreaming. He had to be having a pretty vivid dream where Victor's attention was on him, that gaze picking him apart so efficiently to the point where Yuuri felt naked. A dream where the mentor who pushed and encouraged and criticized, who teased and laughed so beautifully, was asking Yuuri something he didn't think he would actually hear.

Third. Oh, third, all in one second. Victor had actually asked that. That. To go out. On a date? Crap. Victor was looking at him and Yuuri was just gaping at him like an idiot. "...what."

Eloquent. 

Victor smiled rather sheepishly, a blush appearing on his cheeks, which shocked Yuuri. "Will you go out on a date with me?"

A date. A fucking date. This wasn't real life. Not Yuuri's. Things like this didn't just happen. At most Yuuri thought they'd stay close friends, though Yuuri was in the habit of torturing himself with rich fantasies where they could be more. Victor had invited him over to his place after a completed mission, had offered drinks, and their casual conversation had derailed when Victor suddenly asked _that_. "Are you serious?" Yuuri asked, still staring at Victor like he was expecting the older man to change his mind and take it back.

Victor's smile faded and Yuuri feared he was right, but the older man replied, "Completely serious. Why? Unless..." He suddenly blanched and slowly added, "...you have a...a lover no one knows about?"

Yuuri would have spit out his seltzer water if he'd drunk any. "N-no!" he blurted, hurriedly setting the glass on Victor's coffee table before he spilled the liquid in his nerves. Him? Have a lover? A secret lover? 

True, he was a shy, private person by nature. There were things he'd never shared even with Phichit. Thoughts and feelings. Especially his less than innocent feelings towards the man sitting next to him. Victor had always been relentless when it came to getting to know Yuuri, and Yuuri would just...freeze. Lock up. Fear that Victor could just read his thoughts, and find out just what Yuuri got up to at night, fantasizing about Victor with a hand pumping his dick.

Victor smiled again, looking...almost relieved. "It wouldn't surprise me if you did."

"...Why?" Yuuri asked, so thoroughly caught off guard. Victor acted like Yuuri was some kind of heart-breaker, and that couldn't be farther from the truth. No one looked at him twice. Victor...maybe he wanted to humiliate Tsume by luring Yuuri and Phichit away. Maybe it was that he genuinely saw real potential in Yuuri and wanted to offer him more than a life under Minako's heel.

But Victor just kept regarding him with such a bewildered, yet tender look, an expression Yuuri had never seen on his face. Open and oddly vulnerable, strange on the man who could snap a person's neck with ease. "Because I can't stop thinking about you," he said, reaching to take Yuuri's hand in his, like they were a pair of school-aged youths confessing a crush. "Because the first time I saw you I thought my heart would stop. I thought you were beautiful."

"...When we were trying to kill each other?" Yuuri asked, his heart racing while disbelief kept flashing through his head. "This is crazy..."

"Why is it crazy?" Victor asked, turning to face Yuuri and gaze at him with such intensity. Yuuri exhaled shakily, unable to reply as he stared up at Victor's face and felt the warmth and softness of those beautiful hands. "Is it crazy to think that someone wants you?" Victor asked.

Yuuri blushed and looked away. He thought about Victor. He also thought about their lives, their real lives, all the blood and fighting and killing. Missions gone wrong. Everyone else with more talent and charisma than Yuuri could ever possibly have. "...No one's ever..." He shut his mouth after mumbling pathetically, embarrassment prickling up his neck at the admission. How could he ever bare himself in front of the perfect man sitting next to him? Beautiful and strong and charismatic. The object of Yuuri's fantasies. The source of his agony.

"Look at me," Victor said quietly. Yuuri didn't breathe as he shyly raised his gaze, and felt dizzy under Victor's intense stare. Then the older man said in low tones, "I'm dying to kiss you."

Yuuri's heart did a somersault, and he was suddenly too aware of himself, of the way he looked, how chapped his lips were, how red his face must have looked. Why? Why Victor? Why him, of all people? When people like Christophe and Phichit, both of them attractive and confident in a way Yuuri could never hope to be, existed.

But he didn't take his eyes off the other man. He felt his heart slam against his ribs and finally managed to take shaky breaths while Victor brought a hand to his face. All Yuuri could do was remain still, a hesitant joy warming him from the inside as Victor leaned in to kiss him, a soft touch of lips that had Yuuri closing his eyes to really feel Victor's hand on his face, those soft, sweet lips on his, and the wonderful scent from the other man surrounding him.

"You're gorgeous," Victor breathed against Yuuri's buzzing lips, the younger man's head spinning as the kiss ended all too quickly.

"You...you're perfect," Yuuri murmured breathlessly, part of him still wondering if this was all just a very wonderful dream. "...And this is still crazy," he added quietly and reluctantly.

"Then I'm a madman," Victor replied, a desperate look appearing in his eyes before he pressed another kiss to Yuuri's lips and then to the corner of his mouth, a soft moan escaping him. "And I want to kiss you again and again..."

Yuuri felt so dizzy again, and closed his eyes as Victor pressed their foreheads together, still holding Yuuri's face in his hands with such tenderness.

When he breathed properly again he said yes to Victor's first request.

He felt so disconnected from his own body until they finally had that date, and Yuuri laughed without a care as Victor danced with him in his living room.

For the moment, he just tried to breathe again, his poor heart about to burst when Victor kissed his forehead.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> quick note: I'll be leaving on a two week trip to Mexico in a few days. might scrounge up an update, work on the two drafts i've got in here. 
> 
> be nice to retail employees this week too ;)

Yuuri had never thought to put into words how there was such a thing as being so deep in your own head that logic just scampers away and the voice that shouts all manner of doubt into your head becomes even louder, as if taking any permission for granted.

Or your brain was just a traitorous bastard that wanted you to look pathetic and crazy in front of other people. 

Particularly people you were very attracted to, respected, admired, worshiped. 

Which was the problem Yuuri found himself in while he was in Victor's apartment. It seemed as though he was here more often than he was in his own apartment, one that he barely spent time in nowadays. The first time he spent the night in Victor's arms, he barely slept a wink. All he did for several hours was focus on the sound of Victor's deep breaths. Sometimes soft snorts that made Yuuri smile. And the warmth of his long, gorgeous body, wrapped around Yuuri so securely.

Yuuri was surprised his own heartbeat didn't wake the man up that night. It had been by far the most intimate experience of his life and they didn't even have sex. 

That was...definitely something Yuuri wanted rectified. Soon. Tonight. Maybe.

Why did their dangerous lifestyle suddenly seem so simple? At the same time, this was probably the most...normal thing Yuuri had done in years, for all his inexperience in it. He resented the nerves but seized on the expected, almost normal reactions after Victor led him to his bedroom.

He wanted to lose himself in the adoring kisses the older man pressed to his mouth, sink into the heat of that unexpectedly loving embrace as Victor kissed and marked up Yuuri's neck, whispering soft endearments that had Yuuri blushing and writhing beneath him as his heart seemed to flutter in its confines and Victor's hands wandered up his shirt to feel at his chest. It wasn't the first time Yuuri dared to get a hand down Victor's pants, the man smiling against his cheek as the action pushed his pants low on his hip, allowing Yuuri to shyly squeeze his ass.

More kisses, from brief, teasing pecks to deep, passionate moans into each other's mouths while Victor began to fondle him between his legs, making Yuuri gasp sharply and allowing Victor to deepen the kiss, swallowing the timid, pleasured noises Yuuri made. The action distracted Yuuri from undoing the buttons on Victor's shirt, but he finally managed to get it done, pushing it off the man's gorgeous shoulders and greedily grasping at his arms, fingers tracing the tattooed roses trailing down one shoulder.

"Nervous?" Victor asked softly, having drawn away from the kiss to look into Yuuri's face while working on unbuttoning Yuuri's shirt.

Yuuri helped him along as he tried to smile and meet his eyes as his cheeks burned. "I'm...trying not to be," he said right before his breath hitched when Victor gave his bulge teasing strokes with his palm, making Yuuri's eyes squeeze shut. "Fuck...You're...you're so..." His words faded in a soft whine that made his cheeks burn hotter.

Victor chuckled softly above him, stroking up to his chest in gentle, thorough brushes that had Yuuri unconsciously arching up towards the touch. He was so starved for touch, he'd had no idea how bad until Victor just...touched, in any way possible, from a steadying hand on Yuuri's shoulder to greedy squeezes of his rear end. He felt Victor's eyes on him, heard him say in hushed tones, "You're such a sweet little thing." His finger playfully circled around Yuuri's bellybutton, making him smile and laugh softly despite himself, breaking any remaining tension apart. "Want to take all of this off?" Victor asked, tugging at the waist of Yuuri's pants.

"Yeah," Yuuri breathed, wetting his suddenly dry lips as he slowly opened his eyes and took his glasses off. Blurry sight didn't help matters, unfortunately.

Neither did Victor when he pressed kisses down Yuuri's throat, tongue teasing at his hot flesh as it drew a line down the center of his torso. Yuuri's senses were pulled in so many directions; Victor's mouth on his skin, his hands tugging down what remained of his clothes. Yuuri gasped and shivered when Victor kissed his suddenly sensitive side as his hand possessively trailed up the inside of Yuuri's thigh. "So fucking sexy," Victor suddenly breathed, voice sounding ragged as he pressed his mouth to the V between Yuuri's torso and his hip, and his hand wrapped around Yuuri's hard dick right before his soft lips found the head.

Yuuri shuddered out a whiny gasp and tightly grasped the sheets under him as Victor gently licked and sucked at the cockhead, moaning when Yuuri flooded his mouth with pre-cum and sending sharp pleasure and heat down the sensitive length. Yuuri bit his lip, held his breath, did all he could to silence each embarrassing noise that came out of his mouth but it was utterly impossible when Victor was torturing him with his mouth taking more of him, his hands stroking inside his thighs, at his balls, and on his chest, every touch burning in the most wonderful way. "Victor....FUCK, I can't..." He sobbed and moaned as he shook and tried to somehow warn the older man of how close he was, but Victor didn't seem interested in stopping anytime soon. Every movement of his head, his tongue, the way he suddenly swallowed, made Yuuri shout, his thighs trembling on either side of Victor's head.

Yuuri's entire body felt tight as a bow, and Victor was still sucking at him, moaning around him and furrowing his eyebrows as though there were no other thing he'd rather be doing, nose pressing against Yuuri's skin as the younger tried to keep from jerking his hips up into that wonderful mouth, but it was no use and he was moaning in desperation as all of the tension in his body released and he was coming into Victor's mouth. 

He quickly covered his eyes, feeling his chest rise and fall so very quick as all the heat and pleasure melted deep in his bones and even still left him shaking. Victor licked him clean and wetly kissed his way up Yuuri's sweat-slick torso until he was right above him. "Look at me, Yuuri," he entreated softly, gently drawing Yuuri's hand away from his face. Yuuri dared to open his eyes and look up at Victor's glorious face, his breathing managing to slow somehow, by some miracle. Victor was looking at him with such tenderness, beautiful and warm. Yuuri wanted to cry.

"You're stunning," Victor breathed before dipping down to kiss him again, making Yuuri melt under him. "God, I love you," he murmured quietly. 

The words burned in Yuuri's chest, and part of him wanted so much to believe it instantly. Yet the other voice in his head, the one that hounded him day and night, urged him to beg, "Don't say things you don't mean..."

Victor's expression became so surprisingly vulnerable with soft hurt that Yuuri's heart broke further, but the man firmly said as he adoringly cupped Yuuri's face, "I do mean it. With all my heart." He pressed their foreheads together, closing his eyes and smiling tenderly as though he was so happy. "I love you so much..."

He said it so lovingly that Yuuri's heart felt so warm even as he took such shaky breaths and made himself listen, to hear what Victor was saying and the way he said it. This felt...harder than putting themselves in danger every day. But far more preferable than having to kill someone. "I love you too," Yuuri breathed, the knot in his throat releasing as he said what his heart knew but his mind wanted to deny for the sake of keeping his heart safe. 

He encircled Victor's long, pale neck, fingers pressing down onto his warm nape to coax him back into a kiss, and Victor went so willingly, tongue sweeping back into Yuuri's mouth. His cock was hard against Yuuri's thigh, and the feeling of it made Yuuri want to clumsily give Victor back twice the pleasure he'd given him.

Victor kissed his way to his ear as he buried his fingers in Yuuri's hair and his other hand gripped his thigh, and he murmured, "I want to give you everything. I want to make this good for you." Then he gently took Yuuri's earlobe into his mouth to give it a brief suck.

Yuuri gasped and held on tighter to Victor, breaths coming hard again as he allowed himself to feel the warm body lying against him, breathing and moving, finding the muscles and spaces he'd wanted to see and touch. Fingers finding the scars left over from knife and bullet wounds half hidden under the tattooed bouquet of roses, one large starburst sitting much too close to Victor's heart, and another puckering of skin underneath his ribs, found on his back.

"Right where I want you," Victor said softly, smiling wickedly against Yuuri's throat before sucking on the skin there, making Yuuri shiver even more.

"You're gorgeous," Yuuri suddenly moaned, grabbing at Victor's shoulder while his other hand timidly wandered between them both to find his hard cock, drawing yet another moan from both of them. Victor suddenly looked so fragile as Yuuri held him in his palm, eyes full of entreaty as Yuuri carefully began to stroke up and down the length, thumbing at the slick bead that formed. 

Victor begged, "Oh, don't stop. Don't stop, that feels good..."

The wrecked sound of his voice went right to Yuuri's head, and his tongue felt so much braver as he confessed while merrily pumping away at the cock in his hand, "I've wanted this for so long, you have no idea..."

Victor shivered as he laughed, eyes closing in pleasure as his hips slowly moved in time with Yuuri's hand. "I think I do...Fuck, stop. Stop, if I cum I won't get to fuck you, _detka_." 

The reminder gave Yuuri's heart a kickstart, and he couldn't help giving Victor one last stroke for good measure, trying to keep his nerves steady. "Okay..." Had it not been his own life through his eyes, Yuuri never would have believed his first time would be with someone like Victor. Victor, who was stunning and strong, funny and crafty and wicked to his enemies, to anyone who thought they could so much as touch him. Who struck like a snake when one didn't expect it. Here he was, wrapped around Yuuri in a loving embrace that grounded him.

Victor trembled above him before pressing several kisses to Yuuri's face. "You're dangerous," he accused, kissing Yuuri's nose while his hand found its way back to Yuuri's half-hard cock, adding playfully, "And irresistible. Look at you, getting hard again so fast."

Yuuri smiled tremulously, trying not to lose it again so embarrassingly quick. But it was Victor, teasing him and coaxing him right back to where he wanted him.

"Does this happen often? Or is it just for me?" Victor asked teasingly, going back to kissing Yuuri's thighs as he played with his cock and balls in his warm palm. 

"Victor..." Yuuri tried not to whine, but it was near impossible when Victor was just...focusing on him so completely. Treating him like a delicacy, something to be savored slowly.

"You're so fun to tease. Look how worked up you're getting. God, you're perfect." The praise made Yuuri shiver, and he swore his cock twitched. "Spread your legs for me. Relax."

"H-how...?" Yuuri asked, desperate as he reached for Victor's hand and grasped it clumsily.

Victor gave his hand a gentle squeeze as he mouthed at the inside of Yuuri's thigh, kissing the trembling limb. "Don't think. Just feel. Feel everything and tell me what you like. Because I don't plan on doing this just once."

"Oh, God..." Yuuri did as Victor said and spread his legs just a bit wider, breathing as steadily as he could as his chest ached with anticipation. 

He closed his eyes and heard Victor uncap the bottle of lube he'd set aside next to them, then gasped and shivered at the sensation of cool, slick fingers teasing him, and he heard Victor murmur against his thigh right after sucking at the skin, "You look like all my dreams coming true right now." He nudged his fingers between Yuuri's ass cheeks, drawing a soft noise from him as he pressed on the tight hole. "I can barely take my eyes off your ass. Lift your legs up." 

Bewildered and overwhelmed, Yuuri slowly complied, feeling slightly ridiculous and exposed with his hands hooked under his knees and his legs up in the air. "What are you-" He cut himself off with a yelp when Victor easily lifted his ass in the air, Yuuri's back settled against his torso, leaving Yuuri's legs dangling above him. Yuuri blinked only once right before he felt something wet on his exposed hole, sending unbearable pleasure down his spine. "_FUCK!" _Yuuri shouted, body jerking in Victor's hold as the older man vigorously licked into him, giving his ass cheeks brief kisses and possessive sucks right before putting his mouth on him again with moans that made Yuuri shake. "Oh my...Oh my _GOD_...! _VICTOR!"_

He clawed at the mattress, moaned and whimpered as Victor started to fuck him with his tongue, and it was both too much and not nearly enough.

Oh God, and then something was pushing in alongside Victor's tongue, and Yuuri moaned eagerly for the stretch, no longer caring how he looked or sounded, especially when Victor nudged against his prostate as he curled his tongue inside him.

Cock twitching as pleasure burned through the center of him, Yuuri kept moaning until he lost his breath, and Victor kept eating him out, kept fingering him open. "Victor...Victor, please, I'm going to cum...Please, _please! Victor!"_

He was begging, and he'd keep begging, too fucking addicted to feeling so full, and wanting Victor inside, finally filling him up. 

Victor gave his ass one more suck, releasing the cheek with a loud smack that made them both huff out breathless laughs. "You'll drive me crazy, begging like that," Victor said, sounding just as desperate as Yuuri felt.

Yuuri groaned, breaths still hard, "You're one to talk..."

He groaned again, deep and needy when Victor's three fingers sank deeper into him, and he clenched around them. "You feel like silk inside, Yuuri," Victor marveled, kissing his ass cheek with soft noises of pleasure. "Fuck, you're so tight around me. Poor baby...Are you desperate for my cock?"

Yuuri's only answer was a pitched whine as he jerked in Victor's hold again, toes curling with every press against his prostate. 

Then Victor withdrew his fingers and laid Yuuri's lower half back on the mattress. He looked completely disheveled and flushed, but Yuuri wanted nothing more than to beg for more, or else take it for himself. Victor gently stroked his cheek and soothed with a smile, "You've more than earned it, taking my fingers so well and begging so nicely. I want to watch your face when you cum."

Yuuri nodded and lifted his legs again, feeling weak and shaky as he looked at Victor, his heart beating so fast and hard. "Please...Please, I want it. I want you..." The words sounded like something anyone else but Yuuri would express, but...he did say them, and they were the truth.

Victor reached into his nightstand for a condom, and how he was able to concentrate enough to get it on was beyond Yuuri at the moment, his mind on one track as he spread his legs wider and panted with need. Victor stroked himself at the sight of him, remarking softly, "Such a good boy." He bent down to kiss Yuuri, who melted under the praise as it settled in his head. He moaned softly into the kiss, sinking into the feeling of Victor's loving touches to his face and body, tingling as he felt adored. "I'm yours, I'm only yours, forever," Victor murmured against his mouth.

Yuuri smiled before returning the kiss, heart nearly bursting with joy at the promise in Victor's words. 

Victor kissed him deeply as he carefully pushed into him, quietly moaning as he moved his mouth over Yuuri's and then back to his ear as he reached up to stroke his hair to ease the tension that began to flood into his limbs. Yuuri breathed and focused on the touch of Victor's lips on his, relishing their softness as he tugged his legs further back, whining at the stretch. Victor kissed the shell of his ear and murmured in praise, "Good boy. That's my good boy, you're doing so well..."

His voice sounded strained, as though he too were hanging on to the final bit of his control, and Yuuri's breath left him in a shaky moan as Victor moved inside him, deeper still until he was buried in Yuuri. "Oh..._God_..." Yuuri shut his eyes again as Victor stilled, kissing him soothingly and giving him soft words of praise as he brushed his lips over Yuuri's forehead and mouth.

He felt so full, and Victor was hard and heavy inside of him, and it meant the world, it felt spectacular and world-changing...

Even more so when Yuuri shifted his legs until his knees were almost touching his shoulders and the sweet press against his prostate had him moaning and catching Victor's mouth in another kiss, both of them moaning as Victor began to thrust in and out, enough that Yuuri could feel the glorious stretch each time until the thrusts became shallow, and Victor was grinding into him. Each quick push on his prostate drew a gasp from Yuuri, and he clenched around Victor each time. The older man laughed shakily, kissing Yuuri and remarking in low tones, "You're so greedy, squeezing around me like that."

"Does it...Does it feel good?" Yuuri asked, breathless as his lips brushed Victor's.

Another kiss, deep and warm and wonderful, tightening the knot right under Yuuri's heart, and Victor answered in a gentle voice, "You feel perfect, Yuuri. God, I love you, I love you so much..." His mouth found Yuuri's flushed ear again and he breathed out a moan that made Yuuri shiver. "I need you..."

His shallow, sharp thrusts came faster, and Yuuri gasped and tried to bury the noises in Victor's flushed neck, mouthing at the skin with needy whines as he realized just how badly he needed to mark Victor up, to kiss every inch of the other man's body. But he was so caught up, too caught up in the glorious movements of Victor's body above him, inside him, and all Yuuri could do was clutch him close, mind chanting, _He's mine he's mine he's mine._

He wrapped his legs around Victor's waist, practically hanging on to him through the hard thrusts while they moaned into each other's mouths, deep and desperate, Victor keeping his eyes on Yuuri as he demanded quietly, "That's right, take it. Take it all. Look at me, darling, you're so close. Look at me when you cum, Yuuri, I'm going to take you there...Cum for me."

Yuuri held on for only a few more moments before he buried his face in Victor's neck completely and groaned with release, shattering him from the inside out. He dug his nails into Victor's skin, cried out when Victor moaned into his ear when he too came, and held on as tightly as he could. Even as the extraordinary sensation of release gave way to a much too brief high that faded into exhaustion.

Even then he hung on to him, held Victor inside him, relishing this feeling of "normal" for as long as he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and then _running up that hill_ happened


End file.
